Real Talk: Compliment v.s. Complicate

Ciao Bellas,
A wise man always tells my friends and I "Friends should compliment, not complicate your life." In light of recent happenings in my life, I've really been taking a good look at the people I call my friends. Do I have some amazing ones, that show up like the best of and stand out from the rest of? You better believe it. Then there some that I put up with for certain reasons like our families being close, history, etc (By the way, Hi Haters!). One of my favorite songs called "Price Tag" by Christian rapper Da T.R.U.T.H feat. Trip Lee says "I had to let some friends go, got up out that fishbowl..." he ain't never lied. Over time I've had to stop hanging out with some people that I thought were my best friends, because true colors started to show, and I realized that we may of been cool at one point...things just weren't the same. Essentially they were the right people for a particular time in my life, but I needed to get to stepping because I really just didn't (and still don't) have time for people who want to flip flop all over the place. Like in Tyler Perry's play Madea Goes to Jail (and also in his book Don't Make a Black Woman Take Off Her Earrings, which I totally recommend everybody reads. Def gonna be buying it for a few friends), he talks about friendship using the analogy of a tree. To summarize, he says how your real friends are your roots. You may only find 2 or 3 in your lifetime, but they are blessings. Roots don't care about being seen, they are just there to hold that tree up and give it what it needs. Branches you have to be careful with. They won't be able to support all your circumstances you go through and life and will eventually break away. Leaves, are fair weather friends, their nice to cool you off, but usually don't do much but take from the tree. They are only there for a season, and eventually they'll have to go. They accomplish what they were supposed to accomplish for that time in your life, and then move on. When that happens, LET THEM GO. Also keep in mind seasons can be months, or years, you have to be able to recognize them (I know how hard this is, but really baby, let 'em go...and when leaves fall off, new ones grow back. Nobody's saying your gonna sit around friendless and stuff, don't get it twisted haha. Like Kanye said The people in your life are seasons, and anything that happen is for a reason...). The quote I'm talking about is kind of summarized / explained better in this article from eHow, but I highly recommend you either buy Mr. Perry's book or Madea Goes to Jail, it really brings it on home. What I'm trying to do here is share a lesson I've learned, you really need to take a good look at the people you keep around you and determine whether their complimenting or complementing. I've actually organized my buddy list using the tree analogy haha, it just really put things in perspective for me. In closing, I'm just gonna leave you with a lyric from "Dem Haters" by our girl Rihanna:

Get dem haters out your circle.
They smile to your face, but all they wanna do is bring you down.
Remember Fabulosity is a lifestyle, so every so often you'll be seeing entries about stuff other than fashion and style...you know, real talk.

Stylishly Yours,
Ms. Fabulosity

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